Adjustment With the Wife

Questioner: Please explain how one should adjust.


Dadashri: Suppose that, for some reason, you are late coming home and your wife starts to say offensive things, wrong things such as, “You come home so late. I will not put up with this, that, and the other...” If she has lost her temper, then you should say, “Yes, you are right. If you tell me to, I’ll go back. Otherwise, if you tell me to sit, I’ll sit inside.” She will respond, “No, don’t go back, just be quiet and go to sleep.” Then tell her, “If you tell me to, I’ll eat dinner, otherwise I’ll go to sleep,” to which she will reply, “No, have your dinner.” So, you should give in to her and eat. This way, you have adjusted. Therefore, in the morning, she will serve you a first class cup of tea. However, if you were to scream and shout at her, then she would bang your teacup on the table, and [the quarrel] would continue for the next three days.

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